so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Barsexuality is the new black.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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