btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
