remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
