Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Randomize
