one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
