Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize