that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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