I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize
