try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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