So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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