Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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