you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Randomize