Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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