I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
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