She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
