I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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