I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
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