There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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