She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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