just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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