You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize
