these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
