i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Randomize