did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
We had to coat check the pizza.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Randomize
