is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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