He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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