Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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