If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
