The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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