How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
