If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
