There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
As shirtless as possible
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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