doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
