On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
