Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
