I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
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