I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
