I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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