In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
