Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Randomize
