I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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