I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
God gave him joint rollers for hands
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
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