no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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