Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
