Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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