But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
