Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
