i would punch a child for taco bell
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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