i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Did I show you my penis last night?
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
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