69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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