I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
